Ryan Sheckler

There's no way in hell we're touching tonight's 6-2 drubbing at the hands of the Carolina Hurricanes. Instead, here's something else that sticks in my craw.

That damn Ryan Sheckler commercial.

Every year, there are a handful of ads that regional sports networks feel the need to show over and over again. For example, anyone who watched any Mets games in 2007 or 2008 can recite Giuseppe Franco's Procede ad verbatim. So for 2008-09, the ad whizzes at MSG Plus have chosen Ryan Sheckler, his choppy reading of sentence fragments, and his humongous headphones to torment us this season. As if watching a last-place team for 82 games wasn't bad enough. Thanks a lot, MSG Plus.

Anyway, I've seen this ad probably a billion times this year, and I never thought Ryan Sheckler was anybody to be concerned with. But his Wikipedia page paints quite the positive picture of this young fellow. Apparently, he actually is young, and he actually is an award-winning professional skateboarder. I also understand he was the subject of an MTV reality show, but really, who hasn't been? My sources tell me this show wasn't very good. Frankly, I'm shocked. Because Ryan Sheckler's work in the Panasonic ad had me thinking such a show would be a smash hit.

Speaking of this commercial, I got to thinking about how such a commercial would work with a different person. Namely, yours truly. And as much as I despise the Ryan Sheckler commercial, I'd keep the music in the background because I actually like it.

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(start commercial)

BRYAN: My name is Bryan Berg.

(Shot of Bryan skating up to a puck to take a slapshot. He proceeds to miss the puck entirely and fall on his stomach.)

BRYAN: I'm a 27-year-old hockey blogger.

(Shot of Bryan typing away on his laptop. Bryan reaches for a beer.)

BRYAN: Beer is what keeps me going. It's the key to my performance.

(Bryan spills the beer all over his laptop.)

BRYAN: Traveling to new places is always fun. I'll definitely be taking my 40 of Olde English everywhere I go.

(Shot of Bryan wearing a really big set of headphones that have to weigh at least 20 pounds. Bryan takes a swig of beer, but the weight of the headphones causes him to fall backwards out of his chair.)

Panasonic - Ideas For Life

(end commercial)

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OK, so maybe Panasonic hasn't found their ideal sponsor here at The Rivalry. However, try Googling "Panasonic Digital Replay" and notice how many times this blog appears. As for ubiquitous commercials, I wouldn't mind seeing that shady foreclosure/bailout commercial we saw tonight a few thousand more times as the season winds down.

EDIT: That shady foreclosure/bailout commercial comes from some company called "Netlink Funding". Their ad, unfortunately, is not on YouTube. Also, I have no idea how we didn't have a Panasonic Digital Replay tag until now.