Rick Tocchet and Sean Avery...

Today, I will be using simplified examples that never actually happened in my life to describe why Rick Tocchet is a backstabber and how Glen Sather might be insane.

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Let's say I was accused of something in a legal manner. For argument's sake, maybe I ran a gambling ring at my job (for the record, I work at a restaurant as a bartender). Okay, so I'm running this multi-million dollar gambling ring and I get accused, and it comes crashing down on me.

I don't face jail time, but I do get suspended for 2 years from my job. 

While gone, my bar manager supports me fully. I don't receive a paycheck, but he holds my job open while I'm suspended. Imagine that!

Two years to the day later, I return to my job as a bartender.

Four months later, an old friend calls me and tells me he just got put in charge of a new bar, and would like me to be a bartender there. Forsaking my old boss, who treated me very well and stood up for me while the media and the federal court system were against me, I join this new bar.

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 Tocchet gets suspended for running a gambling ring. Wayne Gretzky holds his position as assistant coach of the Phoenix Coyotes open for 2 full years, maybe as a "Thank you for not having my wife sent to jail," maybe out of the goodness of the Great One's heart. Who knows. Tocchet returns in February of 2008, only to join Barry Melrose (and Wes Walz) in Tampa Bay when the opportunity arose.

No, I don't know the whole situation. Maybe Gretzky or Coyotes' GM Don Maloney didn't want Tocchet to return. But the way I see it, it is a slap in the face of Gretzky and the whole Phoenix organization the way he handled this. When I first heard Melrose's press conference where he announced Tocchet and Walz as assistant coaches, I thought it was a joke.

And no, that picture isn't of Howie Mandel.

* * * 

Let's say that since the feds shut down my gambling operation, I now own a small, small business. Last year, I was given $50 in which to run this business. This year, however, I am given $56 in which to run it, due to a rise in profits last year.

Now, my seat-filler, my enforcer, my agitator, the guy who helped me so much last year and the year before, wants a raise. Last year, he made $1.90. Paltry, I know. This year, I offered him $2.75 and he wanted a whole $4. I could probably talk him down to around $3.75 or maybe $3.80. 

Once again, he is a seat-filler. He got my business national attention during a competition we had with a New Jersey store. Two years ago, we competed against an Atlanta-based store, and he closed down their best salesman, even goaded him into a fight. That's what I pay him for. Shouldn't I pay him?

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I like Glen Sather, I do. I think he has done a great job post-lockout, even starting with the "fire sale" of March 2004 (regardless of where Maxim Kondratiev, Josef Balej, and R.J. Umberger are playing now). 

However, he would be terribly remiss to not re-sign Sean Avery. When all is said and done, the NY Rangers are a business. Avery gets butts in seats (yes, they would still sell out without him there... probably), he creates excitement. The Rangers were plastered on TV sets all across the country when he danced in front of Martin "The Whiner" Brodeur in the playoffs this year and when Brodeur wouldn't shake his hand after the series.

He made headlines this week with his article in Men's Vogue. He is constant media fodder.

On top of that, he gets under the skin of every player who plays against him, from Brodeur to Jarkko Ruutu to Jaromir Jagr to Marian "Soon to be Overpaid" Hossa. 

On top of that, he scores. Sather compares him to Chris Kelly of the Senators. Kelly had 30 points in 75 games. Avery had 33 in 57. In 2007, he had 20 points in 29 games and was a +11 with the Rangers. This year in the playoffs, he stepped it up, scoring 7 points in 8 games with only 3 penalties. He has a wicked wrist shot, brings excitement to the team, and as a winger who can play center, has playmaking abilities.

I know you don't come to this blog for breaking news or inside information. Of that, we have little. You probably read elsewhere that the Rangers are 50-20-10 with him and 9-13-3 without him. I don't have to tell you that they went 8-1-1 with him to reach the playoffs in 2007, and 10-0-3 to rally when he was healthy in 2008. You come here because my first word was "Wangers" and because Bryan (my Islander fan friend) was named after a Hall of Fame Islander. We eat and breathe hockey. We've been watching since we were 3 years old. I believe we know more about hockey than any other person we know. 

With that said, I know talent when I see it. Chris Kelly is a marginal player. Ruutu is a pest at best. Ville Nieminen got under people's skin but he couldn't deliver in the points department. 

Avery's closest comparison is probably to Esa Tikkanen. An agitator who can fight and score. A player like him doesn't come along often. Remember when he danced in front of Brodeur? He scored about 15 seconds later.

A player like him doesn't come along often.

If I had a store, and my budget went up 6 dollars, I would gladly spend the 125 cents to bring back my moneymaker. And I would do it before July 1, when other teams can (and would) throw money at him.

Because a player like him doesn't come along very often at all.