Wednesday, April 15, 2009

The 2009 Stanley Cup Playoffs Drinking Game

Hockey fans and boozehounds, rejoice! Even if your team isn't in the playoffs, you can still enjoy the playoffs like they're meant to be enjoyed. So grab a case of Labatt Blue, turn on some puck, and have fun! Feel free to comment with any rules we may have missed.

IN-GAME OCCURRENCES
Drink after each of the following:
- A player looks to the sky after the goalie makes a great save on him
- A skirmish breaks out after the whistle. Chug if it's after a goal is scored.
- A fight breaks out. Chug if the announcers mention how there's rarely any fighting in the playoffs.
- A player checks for blood after being high-sticked
- A player "takes exception" to a cheap shot taken at a star player
- A team sends its goons out to start a fight at the end of a game they're losing. Chug if the announcers mention "sending a message".

STUPID CAMERA TRICKS
Drink any time the following items are shown on screen:
- Commissioner Gary Bettman in a press box
- A head coach
- The Stanley Cup
- One of those stupid pre-game/commercial bumpers where players stare at the camera
- Versus promotes one of its shows below the score bug
- A local paper with an incendiary quote from a player
- A montage of previous playoff battles between these two teams

CLICHE ALERT!
Drink anytime an announcer says the following:
- "This is what playoff hockey is all about."
- "(name of team) can only go as far as (name of superstar) can take them."
- "Lord Stanley's Cup"
- "Your goaltender has to be your best penalty killer."
- "Win the one-on-one battles"
- "See who blinks first"
- "A hot goalie can take you far in the playoffs."
- "(name of coach) is shortening his bench."
- "(name of team) isn't just happy to be here. They want to win!"
- "(name of team) has the last line change."
- "Upper/Lower Body Injury"
- "All you young kids out there..."
- Any discussion about playoff beards
- Any reference to the referees "swallowing their whistles" late in a game
- Any reference to the new penalties for fighting

INTERMISSION REPORTS
Drink any time any of the following events happen:
- A guest analyst is present at the Versus studio. Chug if it's not Rick DiPietro.
- A pundit declares that a team must start "doing the little things"
- An analyst looks at the wrong camera
- A Canadian journalist floats an unsubstantiated rumor. Chug if it involves the Toronto Maple Leafs.
- An interviewed player is wearing a Versus/CBC towel

MISCELLANEOUS
- Kill a beer during each overtime period. Chug each time the announcers mention how there are no TV timeouts during playoff overtime.
- Drink every time the announcers mention how Ken Hitchcock is a Civil War buff.
- Drink every time reference is made to the Rangers' record with/without Sean Avery.
- Chug if Jack Edwards laughs maniacally at a vicious hit.
- Chug every time the following words are used: Economy, Bailout, Stimulus, Obama.
- Drink if the condition of the ice is discussed. Chug if a new sheet of ice was put down because of a concert the night before.

2 comments:

  1. I approve of this... and will hopefully be bringing it to life with you next weekend!

    ReplyDelete
  2. chug all your beer if datsyuk doesn't play!

    ReplyDelete